The model for understanding and developing emotional intelligence to improve project performance consists of five components: 

• self-awareness
• self-management
• self-motivation
• interpersonal management
• Leadership

1. Knowledge of the environment

Self-awareness is the ability to perceive, identify and understand emotions. Low self-awareness is a handicap. Without self-awareness, change cannot be achieved. 

It is important to recognise that many of us have been conditioned in the past to ignore our emotions. So when a certain emotion comes up, we push it aside. And often in cases where a correct intuition pops up.

Self-awareness is necessary to be able to recognise our emotions and read them properly. 

Let's see how!

• Using our physical senses to alert us to emotions - This can include a tight stomach or neck.
• Name the feeling - For example, anger, dissatisfaction, agitation, nervousness, etc.
• Logging - As a project manager we already know how important it is to document everything, well it's the same with emotions. A diary can help us express emotions and deal with them objectively.
• Recognise the intention behind the feeling

Knowing our emotions is important because it helps us to make the right decisions and take the right action. If we don't delve into these emotions, we often react inappropriately, for example out of emotion, which can have unintended consequences. 

Those with a high level of self-awareness:

• more confident
• more credible
• are more receptive to feedback
• the ability to see the objectives set at every stage of the project
• are more open to other people's feelings and ideas

2. Self-management

Self-management is the ability to use our understanding of our emotions to make a good argument. 

Developing self-management skills helps you to make good decisions and take the right action. 

How can we become a master of this?

• Identify the values that guide us in life - Make a list of these and prioritise them.
• Awareness and acceptance of our responsibilities - In other words, we are responsible for our own behaviour and our responses to life situations. Our choices are what put us where we are.
• Plan in advance how we manage ourselves - Those who are good at it make considered decisions, take the initiative, have perspective and react quickly.
• Pause for six seconds to allow the information to reach the rational brain -  Let's say, for example, "I stop and think before I act." Or, "If I were wise, reasonable and compassionate, how would I choose to respond using my best self?"
• Listen to our internal dialogue - The words we say to ourselves are extremely powerful. They immediately reach the subconscious, which reinforces the messages. It is important to avoid negative expressions, generalisations and labelling.
• Let's reframe - Always focus on the big picture, so that it helps to find solutions to the difficulties of the project.
• Ask for feedback

• Let's move - Physical activity can help us to see ourselves and the situation differently. 
• Let's not forget humour - Laughter releases endorphins, hormones that act in the brain to reduce the sensation of pain.

Those who are experts in self-management are: 

1. make a considered decision
2. take the initiative
3. frame events appropriately
4. are perspective and responsive
5. feel their feelings, understand why they have a particular emotion and then decide how to deal with it

3. Self-motivation

Emotional intelligence is not only about managing our reactions to our emotions, but also about being able to generate emotions when they are needed. For example, to increase our commitment to see a project through.

To put it simply, self-motivation is the ability to focus the power of your emotions on a goal. 

For a team to be successful, it must have vision, passion, strength, perseverance and peace. If it lacks motivation, it cannot achieve good results. Team members are often doubtful, discouraged, easily lose focus, feel short-changed, procrastinate, etc.

This is why self-motivation and motivating others is necessary. But how do we do it?

• Visualise - Humans have a unique ability to paint mind pictures. When we create an image of what we want, we trigger physiological responses that would occur if the vision were real.
• Set realistic, challenging goals - These should be linked to specific tasks to make their feasibility clear. 
• Use positive reinforcements

• Create teams - In a supportive team, it is much easier to focus on the goal.

• Recharge - Spiritual, mental, social and physical balance is very important for success. 

People who can motivate themselves effectively:

• optimistic and positive attitudes
• they can assert themselves well
• support the project team

4. Interpersonal management

Interpersonal management is the ability to recognise and respond appropriately to the other person's emotions. If we are able to connect with team members and take their human side into account, they will respond openly, trusting us and themselves. 

What can we do to do this?

• Listening - Listening to the other person without judging or trying to solve the problem is key.
• Feel each other's problems

• Let's encourage - It is important that team members share their creative ideas and concerns.

• Be clear about your behaviour and intentions - Others often only see our behaviour, but not our intentions. The project manager with high emotional intelligence is aware of the impact of his words and behaviour, and because of high self-awareness, he is able to align intentions with behaviour to achieve great results.
• Post some thoughts and feelings, bearing in mind how others might react.
• Testing the assumptions - Understand that everyone, depending on their personality, experience and mental state, only hears part of what is being communicated. 

Those who are effective in interpersonal management:

• manage relationships well
• Compassionate
• trusted
• are skilled in constructive conflict resolution

5. Leadership

It's about the ability to create and communicate leadership, vision and passion - how to help team members or the organisation to get the best out of themselves.

An emotionally intelligent project manager inspires, guides, challenges and supports the team. The project leader's behaviour has a greater impact on the project environment than any other factor. 

REAL FACT:  How it "feels" to work on a project in 52-70% is determined by how it is managed. This has an impact on motivation. 

If the project leader is compassionate, gives clear guidance, cares and inspires the team, much better results can be expected. 

What are the main characteristics of effective leaders?

• regular communication
• humility
• credibility
• striving for team success, not individual success
• visibility
• value creation
• motivation
• passion
• focus
• recognition of success
• elkötelezettség
• networking